Taking My Own Advice

So the post before last was a little about moving and a lot more about considering switching my current career path. And while I haven't signed up for cosmetology school, I have made a huge change that hopefully will open a lot of doors for me. I left my job.

Now I don't want to sound like I'm bragging or anything, but it really is a choice that I'm happy about. Obviously I am making less money, but with my job on the weekend and money that I've saved up, I'm not too worried at the moment. I've also cut down on a lot of my expenses, which helps immensely.

Sooo many things are changing at this time of the year, and it's all coming together quite serendipitously to allow me some freedom to pursue more fantastical dreams of mine. Alongside having my weekdays free now, I have begun splitting responsibilities for my little Biscuit with his father. Having Julian out of the house has been extremely strange and also breathtakingly freeing. It just started at the New Year but I've already gotten so much done.

That post all about cosmetology school had the right thought behind it, it had heart, but it didn't really have my heart. Yeah, I like doing hair, but just my own because I'm just a DIY kind of person. When I'm truly honest with myself and attuned to my higher self and my intuition, what really comes forth is a desire to create a really fabulous vintage boutique, online or otherwise, and also create wonderful things from secret treasure-junk I find second hand. (If this post is written a little weird, it's because I'm in quite a mood and it's very late at night. Bear with me!)

"Treasure-junk", noun. Weird, old, broken or otherwise unwanted items, which when looked at with an open and creative mind, reveal themselves to be priceless objects with almost limitless possibilities.

So... yeah. In a nutshell, I'm really focusing on my own creativity and entrepreneurship right now. I'm booking modeling jobs daily, trying to get funding for my Etsy shop through Kickstarter (link when it's all finalized) and making stuff to sell or for modeling costumes. Basically since I don't have a job, this better fucking work before I find myself desperate for another job that I won't love.

Like his Holiness Tyler Durden once said, "It's only after we've lost everything, that we're free to do anything."

Ok, at least the first part is true so far. Let's hope the second part works out half as well.

Yours in midnight weirdness,
Lily

How to Get the Raddest Hair Ever: A Tutorial on Cuteness

The past two weeks I've been so anxious to change my hair. I loved the pink, but after six months I was ready for a change. And I took a few photos along the way so I could throw together a bit of a tutorial!

 

Lighting was not my friend today so here's an awkward photo

Now, the customary disclaimer: I am NO hairstylist; I never went to cosmetology school. I haven't even been dying my hair for very long. 2014 was the first year I really did it, before I would just cut it myself in all sorts of crazy ways. I have done a lot of research though, and I suggest you do the same. So, as with everything you find on the internet, be cautious and use a little common sense when applying these techniques to your own hair! I'm very artistic, I like trying new things, and I'm not afraid to experiment with my hair (see:bald for a year), so these traits help! But they don't make me a professional. In fact, they probably prevent me from becoming a professional!

Secondly,  I would recommend getting the first bleaching (lightening) done professionally. If you're tight on cash, consider a beauty school where they often give discounted services (but be aware they're still students, although there are teachers there that can give professional advice and oversee all the work done). Thank god I went to a beauty student because I was not aware that I would wreck my hair if I tried to bleach it too much. A previous (crappy) dye job meant I had to cut off a healthy amount of length in order to bleach my hair. You never know what products react with bleach, and when you tell your hairdresser, they will be able to determine the best course of action.

Of course, bleaching on your own is totally possible, just do your research and follow the manufacturer directions! I do all the root bleaching myself and I haven't ruined my hair yet ;)

Anyway, enough of that! Show me some cool hair!

Woah! The photo is a little grainy, but ahhhh I love it so much. I went for a combination of blue, purple and a little pink, but really these techniques can be used for ANY combination of colors.

Let's get started... (assuming your hair is already lightened...)

Pick Your Colors
I chose similar colors from the color wheel. If you don't know anything about that, here's the basics. 

Here's a simple color wheel. Colors next to each other blend really well. Colors opposite will create a high contrast but might not be the most complementary. "Warm" (red to yellow) will all look awesome together, just as "cool (blues, purples, greens) will. I chose cool colors. 

Also consider your current color. Putting blue over orange will make a kind of grey, and that's kind of what happened towards the ends of my hair. I knew that risk but it still worked out well. It helped that I like grey hair. Make sure to get your hair light enough, but be careful! I won't explain it here, but look up "Toning hair" and get an understanding of that. Or get it lightened professionally!

Look up plenty of inspiration and try and get an idea of what colors your hair type can take and what complements your skin tone the best.
 
Supplies
I used three different dyes: Manic Panic "Rockabilly Blue" and "Ultra Violet" and Sparks "Magenta". You can find Manic Panic at Hot Topic or order online. Sparks can be found in most beauty supply stores. Special Effects is a brand I've heard sooo much great stuff about, but I was too impatient to order it online so I just went to my local Hot Topic. Buy plenty of dye, it's better to have extra than not enough.
You'll also need conditioner to mix with your dyes. I used Tresemme conditioner for color treated hair, which you can get pretty much anywhere. I would recommend a conditioner for color treated hair, it's gentler, and then you can use the rest for your hair! 

At LEAST three plastic containers for mixing. You can use cheap bowls, tupperware, or of course hair coloring bowls from a beauty supply store.

Something to mix. I used my comb and a hair coloring brush from a beauty supply store. Some plastic spoons would also work great.

Gloves, 3 Towels, hair clips, wide tooth comb, and some tunes to keep you entertained. Plus at least 5 million hours to work. A willing friend would also be a great addition to the mix!

Oh, and a T-shirt you don't mind messing up! I use this shirt for all my messy projects. 

Do It
Cover your workspace with your towels. I put one on the floor under me and another over the bathroom counter. If you're very careful, you can avoid ruining your bathroom. I only got a few small dots around the place. But they will wash out. Have an extra hand towel to wipe your gloves in between colors.

Section your hair. I sectioned my hair before beginning to get an idea of what I wanted, and to stall out of fear.Your hair should be freshly washed and without conditioner. It should also be totally dry. This will allow the color to completely soak in.The more sections you make, the better blended everything will look. It will take longer though. I actually used even more sections than this when I went to dye it.

Basically, there are your three main sections: Your crown (top of the head), middle section (a thin section that goes from one ear to another) and the bottom hair (under your ears until your neck) Sorry that I don't really have a photo of this.

But DON'T worry too much about perfect sections. In fact, having uneven sections and not separating them with foil will only add the the awesome blend of colors in your hair. There are ways to get very distinct patterns in your hair, but Mermaids, Unicorns and Fairies have no time to worry about that stuff. Blended, flowing colors are what we're going for here!

 Mix It

In your largest container, mix the color you'll be using the most. I wanted mostly blue so that's what I added here. I mixed about 1 part "Rockabilly Blue" and one part conditioner, to lighten the color a little bit. Just pretend you're mixing paint colors in 9th grade! If you're not afraid to experiment, this can be a lot of fun. 

Then I used the purple as it was.  I used the "Magenta" with just a little conditioner. Mix well. 

As you go along, you can mix even more variations of these colors. I probably have at least 3 different shades of each color in my hair. Some of these are just one small section, while others are larger sections or in more than one spot. 

To create very light colors, start with a dollop of conditioner. Add one very small drop of your color, mix, and repeat until your get your desired color. This can be done the opposite way too; start with your color and add a little conditioner. But you can't get pastel this way, just a little lighter. Start with conditioner first if you want pastel (but remember, you basically need white hair first to get that light). 

With vegetable based dyes like Manic Panic and Special Effects, you can mix them together too, just like you would with paint. Blue and yellow, green. Blue and red, purple....etc. I didn't mix colors, just mixed them with conditioner. Some brands also sell "clear" which can be used to create pastels, but I haven't read anything that gives me the impression it's any better than conditioner. Just more expensive :/

Dye it!!!

Here's some photos of my hair, before I rinsed out the color. You can get an idea of my sectioning. Large sections around the crown and bottom, with smaller sections throughout the middle and front of my hair.

Start with the bottom sections of your hair. I worked from the right to the left, and I saved my bangs for the end. If you have bangs, I would totally recommend adding a bright color right in the front like I did. It really adds a great pop and stands out a lot. 

The basic process for applying color is pretty simple. With your less-dominant hand, hold your section out from your head. With your dominant, or writing hand, take a small amount of the hair color and apply to the roots. Apply color to all sides of the roots. Continue adding color, working towards the ends. 

Make sure to use small amounts because you don't want to drip onto yourself or the floor. Rub your hair, work the color all throughout. This is another reason to use small sections, so you don't miss any hair. If you have a large section, break it into a couple smaller parts.

If you have bangs, I don't recommend making them all one color. I used three colors in my bangs. For the pink, I made a triangle section on the right side of my bangs (use a comb and go diagonally from the middle of your head to the front of your hair). The purple and blue is placed on the left side, and they are sectioned horizontally. It's really hard to explain in words, and I'm sooo sorry I didn't take more photos. But I really didn't want to get my phone blue :(

 

Haha, my poorly photoshopped picture. Whatever, my hair still looks cute! With my little Ariel bow my love gave me for Christmas :) And I had to wear my Unicorn shirt today!

But once again, take this opportunity to experiment! Whatever happens, it will wash out and your hair will grow back and you can try again soon. In one year, my hair went from totally bald to a nice little bob. And if it's completely ruined, well, Pixie cuts are really popular these days ;)

If you have no experience dying your hair, watch some youtube videos to get a better idea of how to apply the color. This can also give you more ideas on different ways to section your hair! 

Wait, then Rinse

I waited a little over an hour to let the color soak in completely. My hair was almost completely dry. You can go more or less, because with vegetable dyes it won't damage your hair if you leave it longer. But don't go less than what it says on the bottle. 

When you rinse your hair, forget the tub. You're going to splash colored water everywhere and just have a huge mess to clean the next day.  Don't even look at your bathroom sink either. Head straight to the kitchen and rinse there. The stainless steel sink is perfect for avoiding mess and the faucet is usually much higher, allowing you to reach your whole head underneath it. 

Use cool water and rinse until the water runs clear. Gently run your fingers through your hair and scrub gently to get the color out. Don't use shampoo today, save it for when your hair really needs it. Use a bit of conditioner and rinse again. Ta-da! You're finally done, now go to bed. 

Pro-Mermaid-Tip: Braid your hair now and wake up with beautiful waves in the morning, which will show of the mix of colors much better.

Resources

• Howtohairgirl.com has a ton of tutorials and information on all things hair, like this one! She actually is a hairstylist (aka people pay her) and she is awesome! There's also a lot of information about all natural hair care, like the no-shampoo method which I am going to start trying!

• Gala Darling wrote long ago on how to be a beautiful dyed dollie, and also on no poo.

• OffBeatLook on Youtube has a few really good hair dying tutorials and this video really helped me get my pink out.  

• This is a super quick and simple video that shows how to get a really pastel pink, which can be done with any color and made darker with a few more drops of color. Note how light her hair already is!

And to finish off, here's a look at exactly how light my hair was to achieve these colors. On the right was when I last dyed it, about 7 weeks ago. The middle was after 6 weeks, when I normally touch it up. The left is most recent, after using a baking soda treatment to remove the color and a gentle bleach bath treatment, both of which I mostly used on the ends so I didn't damage the light parts. 

Hey, I know this was very long but thanks for taking the time to read the whole thing (you know you just skimmed it though). Hopefully this was helpful and informative. Good luck on your hair journey, whatever it may be! 

Sending out lots of love to all my magical creatures,

Lily

Career Changing Advice + Randomly Moving Out!

Sorry that I haven't posted anything lately! I was doing pretty good there, wasn't I? Well, at least I have a good reason this time, plus some pretty big news. I was moving!!

"What? Didn't you just move in to your apartment?" I hear. Yeah, I did. And it seriously sucks having to move out again. But guess what? I really hate to admit this... my apartment had... bedbugs!!! Barely a couple days after moving in, the Biscuit and I started getting bites, and the apartment's weekly treatments did nothing to reduce the presence of the bugs. For obvious reasons of horrible-ness, I haven't really talked a lot about this, on the internet or to people I know.

They are seriously gross! This is one post I won't be adding pictures to, don't worry ;)

Yep, after barely a month of living there, I began the process of breaking my lease, finding a new place, and moving out. Right before December started I moved back into my boyfriends moms house. She's got an extra room downstairs with a small den next to it that is all mine now. I'm all moved out and beginning to settle in.

So that stress is almost off of my shoulders. I still am waiting for my deposit to return, and hopefully the management doesn't try and screw me over now that I'm out :/

In other news, I'm considering switching out of community college and into cosmetology school. Something about that sentence makes me feel a little white-trashy, but hey, I did grow up in a trailer park so it ought to make sense. I'm finding myself increasingly bored at work, unmotivated in my studies, and constantly questioning my future and the career path that I'm on. Plus my recent dye job went amazingly and got me thinking that a career in hair and makeup might go well.

I've always cut my own hair, painted my own nails, and obviously I do my own makeup every day. Most people in my family have actually encouraged me to pursue a more creative field but something very practical inside of me led me to attempt real college. Suffice it to say, it hasn't been working out very well.

So this month I'll be touring schools, talking to financial aid officials and getting myself set up for starting sometime in the spring. I'll be going full time and should be done in about a year. That's the most tempting part! Waiting four-six years to finish a bachelors degree just sounds less and less appealing every day.

Some great advice I've read/heard/learned in my tarot recently that has lead me to this decision:

• If you think you're in a dead-end job, you probably are. 
• If you could do anything without worrying about money (imagine you won a huge lottery) what would it be? Now go and do that. 
• Just because your job offers security, doesn't mean it offers fulfillment (woah, just made that up myself! High-five!) 
• Creative careers are actually some of the more recession proof ones out there. Haircutting, painting, jewelry design all require humans. Maybe people with lower incomes won't be able to afford it in tough times but there's always someone out there who can (assuming you've got the talent) 
• Could a computer do your job? You might want to start looking for a new one before the Matrix begins. In my job, yep; computers, TV and phones are often used to babysit children. 
• If your boss says she wants to promote you, then offers it to someone else, you should probably look for another job :P

Good luck with whatever changes are coming your way,
Lily

Apartment Decorating

My apartment looks so different than it did when I first moved in! That's all thanks to my step-grandmother, Jaqueline. She gave me a bunch of her old furniture and bought me a bunch of new stuff too! I was so blown away by her generosity that I was literally speechless and still have no idea how to fully thank her and my grandfather.

Loveseat from my grandmother that helped me discover the timer on my phone camera ;) Bed is behind loveseat, and I need a huge painting to hang above it!

At first it seemed like I had so much that I couldn't even fit it all in. But since then (about two weeks ago) I've rearranged and organized everything and it's perfect!

Little TV/DVD player from sweet Courtney, PS2 from lovely Sebby. Yeah, I keep it old school. Cube shelf and cubes from Gma <3

Since I just have a one bedroom, I put Biscuit in the bedroom so I could have the rest of the house to roam around in at night. It's a little squished in the living room but the layout fits very well with it. When I first moved in I only had once chair, and it was just an old folding one. Now I have a cute white wicker chair and a sweet little wicker loveseat. Normally I think they're meant for the patio, but she had them both inside and I like them inside too. I've always loved wicker chairs, but sadly I had to leave my great rocking chair behind when I moved!

 Been focusing on my spirituality lately and that led me to put together this little altar. Here I've got my tarot cards out to cleanse in the moonlight overnight.

 Seb's stepmom got my this "awesome" frame for my birthday, but it broke not long after I took this photo :( I kept the frame though and it's made a great tray for decorations on my dining table.

 My tarot box set and a blue wolf from Courtney. She bought it to match a lavender one I already had ^_^

I have so much great new stuff that I can't even begin to describe it... so I hope you enjoy these pictures instead! As it comes together I'll be posting more, along with any DIY decorations that I do.


Thanks for looking around,
Lily

Favorite Vegetarian Recipes

I've been vegetarian off and on since middle school. Back then, I was a lot more active in animal rights action, but these days, I don't make a big deal about it. In middle school I petitioned to add vegetarian options to the school lunch menu. It didn't work out so great - I got a lot of trouble from kids and didn't get enough signatures anyway. For various reasons over the years I've gone back and forth. 
Now I'm an adult, buying and cooking all of my own food, and also providing for my son. Since February I've been vegetarian, save the occasional bacon at work or if I'm a guest somewhere. I try not to be extremely strict on myself at this point, because I'm still getting used to it. But finding awesome new ideas and recipes really helps me from going crazy and eating stir fry and rice every day. 
Obviously Pinterest is the easiest resource for finding new recipes.

Some of my favorite recipes I've discovered recently are...

Butternut squash enchiladas, by Skinny Taste

These were a little more complicated than I normally attempt, but damn was it worth it! These were amazing. If you don't mind a bit of a challenge in trying something new, I would really give these a try. The only part I did not like about this was that the oven was only used 10 minutes. Next time, I'd probably undercook everything in the skillet and bake longer, by at least another 10 minutes. The oven just takes to much energy to be used so shortly. Or, you could place the enchiladas in a microwavable dish and melt the cheese in the microwave, removing the oven altogether.

Best Asparagus in Under 10 Minutes, by Ella Claire

The title says it all. Pretty simple and seriously delicious! This was fun because I've never actually cooked asparagus, let alone eat it very often. This just made it my new favorite vegetable.

Fish tacos with Cilantro Peach Salsa, by Feasting At Home

I really only used this recipe for the salsa, and just made the tacos my own way. But it was amazing! The salsa was so flavorful. It was my first time making something like this and I'll definitely be making it again. The tacos were great as is or with a little rice added. I saved the leftover salsa and threw it on a veggie burger and it was the best thing I've ever had (that may or may not be an exaggeration). I'm sure this would be great with shrimp too, or with salmon, whatever! Perfect to spice up a boring frozen veggie burger too. Even my boyfriend who doesn't really like cilantro loved it with some chips.

Fall Kale Super Salad, by Seasons and Suppers

 

I got a bag of cut and cleaned kale on a really good sale, so I needed a bunch of recipes to use it before it went bad. This recipe was the best of all that I tried. This salad seriously fed me for a week! I made a huge batch and had some with most of my meals, and larger portions for lunch. I also used raisins instead of cranberries (way cheaper) and used a strawberry poppy seed dressing, so the salad turned out really sweet! This really was a super salad, and even a small cup was very satisfying. This is probably the most salad I've eaten all year! And obviously salad is very important if you're going to be vegetarian hehe.

So there you have it - main dish, side, salsa and salad. Although I wouldn't recommend eating these together lol! But these are some good vegetarian recipes to mix up your usual meals. Don't be afraid to try this new stuff. All of these recipes were completely new to me, and this was the first time I've tried them! I'm still starting out cooking and they didn't prove to be too challenging. It's important to add new things so you don't end up eating spaghetti every night ;) kind of like I used to!

Do this today, Thank yourself tomorrow

So many amazing things have been manifesting for me this year, it's hard to pick the one I'm happiest about. My modeling is right up there with getting my own apartment, but it's special, because it's something I'm doing purely for myself. I haven't even had a paid shoot (YET!) but I'm still extremely proud that I've been following this little passion of mine and actually being pretty successful at it.

 

My first photoshoot was when I was 17, and as you can see, I was everything a 17 year old should be - messy and rebellious. Yes, that's a mohawk, albeit a very poorly put together one. It had been months since I'd put my hair up so it had grown too long to stand. But I loved it, and I was so excited for the pictures. For some reason though, it took years to go and try modeling again!

 

Now this is completely different from that last one! As it should be, being about four years apart. This is from my most recent shoot, which I did with the amazing Mr. Donigan and the Pinup Bombshelter in Denver. I seriously wish I could do this for a living. Being a regular model for a company like Pinup Girl Clothing would be my dream come true. This year I've done a few shoots but this was my first vintage one, and my favorite. Daily, I don't really have the time anymore to curl my hair like this, but I do whenever I get the chance, and the last several years I've really fallen in love with everything 50's. My goth-punk days are definitely behind me and I've heard that Rockabilly is where old goths go to die ;)

So I had a little break while I moved, but now I'm working on another shoot. Right now I don't really care if it's not paid since I'm just enjoying the experience, networking, and trying to gain a bit of an audience. But hopefully one day this might actually become something more! My idols like Dita Von Teese show that not all successful models need to be in Vogue or runways, even though that's where she's ended up.

When my son had just been born I was very depressed that I wasn't achieving these kinds of things. But he's barely a year and a half (what?! Already one and a half!?) and look what I've accomplished! I had to get rid of some negative influence in my life (guess who) and since that time I have absolutely blossomed into much of the person I want to be some day; into who I've always wanted to be.

Find whatever is holding you back and get rid of it! You'll thank yourself later ;) and you might thank me too, hehe.

Love, goodnight,
Lily

I'm back!

As my last post suggested, yes, I took a biiig hiatus. And a lot has changed since then! To avoid further confusion, here's the basics -

• Julian is 1 1/2 years old now, walking and even talking! Expect to see more of that soon ;)
• On October 2nd I moved into my own apartment, and I couldn't be more excited! I will be writing lots of decorating, DIY and food posts once I get settled in. 
• I've changed a LOT about my appearance, and I couldn't be happier or more comfortable in my own skin. I dyed my hair, re-gauged my ears (they were like 00's in highschool), and have two tattoos now. This year is apparently an enormous time for change in my life but I haven't been this happy in years! 
• I've re-focused on modeling and have completed several photo shoots this year. They just keep getting better and better! You should definitely check me out on Facebook or Instagram (lilyaurora9) to support my art :) I would greatly appreciate it!!! 
• Julian's father and I split up. Yes, that's it, and that's all I'm going to say on it.
• I do have a new boyfriend, my longtime friend, Seb. And again, that's pretty much all I'm going to say about it.
• Overall I've been working my ass off but still managing to stay positive and pursue my other goals, and I plan on writing extensively on how I manage to stay sane (well, at least pretend that I am).

I've spent three nights in my new apartment so far. I absolutely love it! The inside is so cute and the neighborhood is great too. It's still a huge mess, but here are a few spots I've got set up so far:

 This is just a little shelf with my little doo-dads, and a bit of an altar to keep me grounded :) The Lucky Cat and jade Buddha were birthday gifts from my man. Everything else is a mix of gifts and random stuff from the thrift store or made by me.

 I don't have space for a coffee maker so I got this french press from Ikea. I bought this tea kettle from the thrift store, and got another second hand (not pictured). Both of these mugs were also second hand :) I was really lucky and haven't actually bought very much because I know so many generous folks!

 A little art for my wall: A puzzle, Julian, flowers, and my Grandmother when she was younger, and a poster blown up from my own painting from high school.

This is seriously how much counter space I have :/ There's a bar across from this, but it has plants and some other stuff, not really the size for appliances. I covered half of the stove tops, put my dish rack in the left hand sink, and had to place my microwave sideways to fit it in. It works but I definitely need to be careful in my organization. Each side is barely a foot wide.

I really want to get back into posting regularly, and posting thoughtful, helpful ideas instead of just journaling. The more I get settled here the easier that will be!

Thanks for reading,
Lily

Blog Hiatus - Creating a New Purpose

Since it's the new year I had wanted to do a "2013 Review" kind of thing, but I'm honestly sick of that shit. When I first started blogging, I had no intention of it being diary-like at all. I don't believe anyone really cares about what I did this week, and the people who do can actually call me on the phone to talk about it. I've never even been huge on keeping a secret diary, so why would I write my hum-drum goings-on for all the world to see (or ignore)?

So somewhere along the line between posts about crafts and posts about being a mom, I lost track of that idea I had. So I'm taking a break to get myself and my thoughts back on track. And no... this was NOT a New Years resolution! It's just naturally a time for new beginnings...

This started when I was browsing Lifehacker, and stumbled upon this holy-grail post: How Can I Write a Successful Blog and Get More People to Read It? 

One idea from this article caught my eye: Can you come up with 52 post ideas, one for each week of the year? After focusing on the topic and purpose of my blog (Hello, 9th grade English), I was able to churn out about 20 in probably 5 minutes. I was actually excited. I still am! All I want to do now is write this all out because my head is overflowing... but I have to put Julian down for a nap :(

Basically, it still revolves around what I've been writing about: Julian, and my new life as a mom. Just with much more purpose and a lot less "So, today I..."

I've been lucky as a young mom. Both sides of our family were happy and supportive since day one of my pregnancy. Renato and I both have good jobs, we have lots of great friends and family who help babysit Julian, and he is about as easygoing as a little boy can be. But there are still struggles with judgement from older moms and childless teenage peers, struggles with holding onto my youth, and struggles to remain positive with an uncertain future. 

I want to reach out and create (or join) a community of young moms, who refuse to conform to either the "lame mom" or "idiot teen mom" stereotypes, and are proud of their families and their role as a mother. I've seen a lot of mommy blogs that are written by well-to-do, 30 something stay at home moms. There are even some goth moms blogging out there, like the amazing Adora BatBrat. But there's not really anything aimed out there to encourage and inspire bad ass young moms... who are dealing with a lot of responsibility in an already hard time in their lives, and really need it.

I could keep writing all day, but this is already insanely long and -gasp- there's no pictures to look at! So I will end here and leave you with this:

 

 
Cool parents make cool babies. 

Lily

Christmas Eve

Merry Christmas from us to you! I'm posting this from my new iPhone 5c which is actually the first smartphone I've ever owned.

As you can see from the picture, Julian is not feeling well. He's got a little cold and it's making him pretty fussy today. I'm having a lot of trouble getting him to nap. Let's hope he feels better soon, because...

... tomorrow we're flying to Texas! I'll be there until New Years Eve seeing all of my family. This is already Julian's second time flying. I don't know why more parents don't take advantage of the deals babies get. They fly free until 2, plus strollers and car seats can get checked for free (on most flights). A mom can even bring her diaper bag as an extra carry on item. So who created the myth that families can't travel and have fun? Some of the most fun places were completely designed for kids and families. Anyway, I can't wait. 

Holiday wishes and runny noses, 

Lily and Juju

Things I Love Thursday

I'm getting back into the habit of writing more often and to keep up, here's a little piece of gratitude inspired by the always fabulous Gala Darling. I've been reading her blog for probably two years now and she's a great inspiration for so many reasons.

This week, I'm really loving...

• Dressing up again. I did some shopping yesterday and today I'm channeling Morticia Addams.
• Christmas excitement! Our tree is so little and cute and our hearth it full of presents. 
• Julian fed himself with a spoon this morning!
• All the dorky Christmas crafts I've made at work. Right now there's a pine-cone snow man on the dash of my car. I made him a scarf. 
• Planning my trip to Texas! I'll be there between Christmas and New Year's and Julian is coming with me to meet the rest of our family.
• Christmas shopping. What more is there to say?
• Courtney, who is always a doll about watching Julian and who  has become a good friend <3
• Jackie, who also loves watching Julian and is actually getting him today!

Thanks for sticking around,

Lily

But... I'm Still Cool

 Last night my roommate discovered some old pictures of me on Facebook, specifically, a photoshoot I did when I had a mohawk (WHAT?! Yes, if you didn't know: I had a mohawk, and then I was bald. Let's continue...). They were pretty awesome pictures thanks to a great photographer, and my Dad is lucky enough to have a large copy at his house. But she called me in her room and said, "You used to be so punk!" Of course she didn't mean it in a mean way, because after she said, "Now you're always so elegant," but of course it got me thinking...

 An older shot of my mohawk and my baldness

I never really thought I was that cool anyway. It may not have seemed like it to most people, but I always felt like a weirdo and I definitely embraced it and ran with it. Even when people did give me compliments or whatever I was more often suspicious of their motivations instead of grateful. Like, "Why is this cool person talking to me? Is this a trick?" Carrie had had a big impression on me early in life. 

Now, this is the last picture I found on my computer that's just me; no Julian. It's from July! I look so normal. Normal cut, un-dyed hair, plain makeup, normal clothes... that necklace was a gift from my step-grandma. How... boring! Yeah, I look nice and on most days I still look nice and dress pretty... but it's just so boring and uninspired.

There's no way I'll go back to a huge deathrock mohawk or frilly Decora dresses (I've tried a lot of different styles), but I miss having fun with my clothes and getting to dress up. I don't even blame it on being a mom - I'm just in a creative rut and I have a job that makes me dress pretty conservatively, plus I don't have a lot of opportunities to go all-out. Oh, yeah, and I'm broke.

Wish me luck with the $50 spending money I have left to find something that will kick my ass back into gear. Should it be clothes or green hair dye?

Until next time...
Lily

And now there's 6

Ever since I moved out of my mom's house about a year ago, I've been lamenting the fact that there was no dog around! I've had dogs my whole life and they were a normal part of my everyday routine. For a while that was a good thing, since I had a different kind of small animal to take care of, but now that we're in our own apartment we decided it was time. Legally this is our roommate's dog, since they paid for him and are going to pay his rent, but we all care about him and share taking care of him. Everyone... meet Link! (The dog formerly known as Chico)

 He is a Chihuahua mix that we picked up at the shelter on Monday. There were a few other dogs that we wanted to meet but they got adopted very quickly, plus, they were probably too big to have around Julian. He's just the right size for our apartment, but he's not buggy-eyed or shaky (no offense to Chihuahuas that are like that)

 So far him and Julian are getting along fine. They don't seem too interested in each other most of the time but they aren't fighting either. Link is a serious lover and jumps on anyone's available lap to curl up. If your door is open, he'll jump in bed and snuggle up with you too! He's lazy most of the day but he can be very fast and energetic if you give him the chance and play with him. And damn he can jump high! He's got great balance and can stand and walk on his hind legs for a long time. I'm glad to be around a dog again, even if he's only slightly bigger than my old rat Octo.

Julian will soon be bigger than Link. He's growing so fast; at 7 months old he wears 9 month size clothes and they fit him snuggly. He can army-crawl around the room at a terrifying speed, and yesterday he took two little crawling steps before plopping back on his belly. He grabs anything around him to help pull himself up onto his knees. I can put him on the floor of the living room, go in the kitchen, and he'll actually scootch himself and follow me! It's so cute but scary at the same time. Soon he'll be completely mobile and I'll never be able to let him out of my sight!

 

It's been a pretty warm fall here, which was nice in a way, but today it finally snowed! After living in Colorado for over 10 years now, I've finally began to actually like the snow and I look forward to taking Julian out to play in it.

With Teeth

I saw an old acquaintance from  high school yesterday and we got a chance to talk and catch up. Of course a big part of that was talking about Julian, and I got the usual question, "Is it hard being a mom?" I really haven't found it this way. Julian is so relaxed and does great playing and hanging out by himself, giving me a chance to take care of myself. Even teething, supposedly a very tough time for babies, went smoothly for him.

Yesterday morning Julian woke up with two new teeth. Another top tooth looks like it will pop out soon. Over the past week, he hasn't been screaming and has slept relatively well, despite his tooth pain. He's just been a little grumpier than usual, but that was easily handled just by playing with him more and giving him a little medicine.

I am both proud and scared of how quickly Julian seems to be growing. The other day he actually grabbed onto the coffee table and pulled himself up to a standing position! We both literally screamed. He wobbled for about half a second before taking a little tumble back down. After that incident I had to put some corner bumpers on it :)

I don't have any pictures for this post, but I'll keep my camera out and have something ready for ya'll next time. Thanks for still checking in here even though I stopped writing for a while!

Sorry!

I've had a lot going on the past month or so, so I haven't written anything since September 16th now. In fact, I have barely gotten online at all except to check my email and watch True Blood. But, with all that going on of course I have some exciting new things to share!

We moved in to our new apartment!

I'm not going to put many pictures because there's not much to show. We still don't have a ton of furniture or decorations but that doesn't stop it from feeling like our home. I'm so proud and it's hard to explain the feeling of living on your own for the first time. It's been over two weeks now and there've been no fires, we've eaten many real dinners, and have even thrown a party.

Here's a really unflattering picture of our kitchen - but I just needed something to show and it's probably the most interesting part of our living areas. This was just after our Halloween party, explaining the candy bowls and the mutilated pumpkin. Can you spot the Hello Kitty toaster? It burns her face on your toast... Let's just say my roommates wanted to buy a new one. 

Here's Julian from about 6 months old. He can sit on his own now! And I know he'll be crawling soon, at least before Christmas. He's getting so big and mobile now, it's honestly king of scary.

And he's eating solid foods now! Thank you WIC for giving us a bunch of baby food jars and baby cereal. He LOVES food so much and gets so excited.

Anyway... even my dad has asked why I'm not blogging anymore. I was so surprised when he asked me this! Well this is for you Dad! I really want to get back to writing regularly, especially because Julian is going through so many changes now and we are having a lot of new experiences in our own apartment. Such as our neighbor dropping off a bottle of wine as a housewarming gift... although none of us are over 21! Haha.

Ok, well thanks for still reading after my little hiatus. I really appreciate it! And a special thanks goes out to my Dad to reading and keeping updated on his little G-Son, and to anyone out there who actually doesn't know me in real life but just finds this a little interesting!

Have a great weekend everyone,
Lily

Twenty

Last week I turned twenty years old.

This is an overlooked age, sandwiched between the great 18 and the wildly fun 21 (I didn't mean for those to rhyme, I swear!). But personally, this was a really important birthday for me, and I think it deserves more credit worldwide. So important I actually wanted to have a party for once, but sadly, most of our money was sunk into our new car.

The past year has been a whirlwind and an amazing challenge. So many things happened that I can't do it all justice in one measly blog post, so your might see this subject pop up again. It started just before my 19th birthday when I went on a great Western adventure with my sisters, camping across 6 states. Less than a month after my return I wound up knocked up by a guy I'd been dating for two months (every time I think of this I shudder). I started my first real job and began college. All in all... it was a very busy year.

Arches Nat. Park, Utah. Camping and Hiking with my favorite sisters. A great adventure before I had to settle down.

Now I'm twenty years old.

I'll never be a teenager again. I'm not a teen mom. I'm a young woman who is still facing a lot of challenges but last year was so wonderful I'm not afraid of what might come. I know I've got an angel of a baby and we'll all be alright. My new motto is, "As long as Julian isn't crying, everything is fine." Well, right now he's sound asleep. 

As always, thanks for reading.
G'night,
Lily

Just what's been going on...

I haven't posted in over a week! I can't believe it. It seemed like I was doing pretty good there for a while! Ever since I went back to work, each day has seemed to go by so quickly and before I realize it, it's ends up being three days since I washed my hair. Kind of gross, but supposedly it's better for it anyway. But by working, so many things end up being pushed to the side... I am glad to be back though and so SO thankful that I only have to work part-time.

Besides not writing, I haven't worked on my scarf this whole week. Luckily it is a quick and easy stitch or else it might end up like Julian's Bobble Blanket. Yes, that thing is STILL unfinished. I know, I'm ashamed! The only consolation I have is that he shouldn't even be using blankets right now :(

Besides working, we have been stressed out and our budget stretched thin because of buying a new car in very short notice. Our Marquis started dying and it was not worth any repairs. Now we have a little Hyundai and we've both learned to drive stick shift pretty well. It only stalls once in a while.

I had a cold and now I think Julian has it too, because he just sounds phlegm-y. It doesn't seem to bother him though. Our "sleep camp" is going great right now. He spontaneously began sleeping overnight for the last two nights! Although it's in a bassinet and not his crib, it's still a huuuge accomplishment. I think this weekend, if he continues sleeping well, I'll start transitioning into the crib.

Speaking of the weekend, it's almost my birthday! I turn 20 on Monday. This is an important birthday for me because of everything that has happened this past year. Julian was conceived just over a month before I turned 19. I got my first real job, began college, AND had a baby all this past year! That's a lot and I feel like I need a vacation... but getting a good nights rest will be good enough for now.

Goodnight!
<3

What I Made

Last year I made a scarf that, well... came out pretty horrible. I made it lengthwise so it came out too long and too thin. Plus it was just a plain double crochet throughout and it was really boring. So before fall and winter comes back I'm remaking the scarf, and here it is so far:

 It's about a foot long already. I undid the scarf from last year and am reusing the yarn. This pattern shows off the colors so much better. I can't remember the name of this yarn but it's soft and kind of unraveled.

 Here's the pattern up close. It is a basket-weave stitch that I found from this YouTube video.
It's really simple but creates an interesting pattern. The scarf is turning out very plush and I know it will be cozy and warm for the tough Colorado winters.

In other news, Julian is now able to sit up with only a little help!  He's growing so big and strong at just 4 months old. He can stand too while you only need to hold his arms to help him balance. He hates tummy time but loves standing so I really think he'll be walking before he can crawl!

Well, either way it will happen before we know it. He's so precious right now, chubby and laughing but not really able to do a lot... He's the perfect image of a baby. Julian is just now acting interested in food. He doesn't want to eat it but when I sit him on my lap he tries to grab my plate or bowl. Two weeks ago he grabbed my bowl of oatmeal and completely jammed his hand inside! He ended up covered in oatmeal, it was hilarious. He ate some banana straight off of the one I was eating just the other day! It's so exciting and fascinating to watch all the changes and growth he is going through every day. I love this kid so much!

Well thanks again for reading and keeping up with things, hopefully I will have another video up soon!

Have a great night, goodnight!!
Lily

Sleeping through the night!

So it's been about a week since I wrote about getting Julian back on a sleep schedule. In that time, he's gotten waaay better! There's still some nights he sneaks back into bed with me (crafty little guy) but he's already slept through a whole night. It was only once, but that's a big deal!

Every night he's asleep around 7, except on Mondays where I get home later so he's in bed more around 8. This first chunk is the easiest for him to get through. Then he'll wake up anywhere from 9-11, and I'll feed him and put him back to bed. This is where he sneaks back in bed with me, if he does. If it's past 11 and he's having a difficult time going back to sleep, I just kind of give up. But if I'm already in bed I give him a chance to fall back asleep, as long as he's not actually crying. He's been able to wake up, wiggle around and shout a bit, then put himself back to sleep two or three times now, at least that I was awake to see.

So my goal is to have this down pat by the time he's 5 months old, so I have about 3 more weeks to go. So far it's going pretty well.

For more of Julian's progress and fun we've been having, here's a video from July when he was three months old. Enjoy!




Thanks everyone who's watched my videos and a special thank you to my first subscriber! Yay!

Getting to Sleep

Today (last night, really) I decided that I was going to drop all other goals that I've been working on and focus on just one: getting Julian to sleep through the night. He has done this only ONCE in his own crib, and once in a bassinet.

This last month I've been really lazy about Julian's bedtime routine. During my visit to Austin, I didn't have a separate place to put him to sleep. So, he slept with me. I found out I could nurse him back to sleep without even having to get out of bed or even fully wake up. Yes, cardinal sin of all sins for babies, but for the past month Julian has mostly slept in bed with me, at least part of each night.

But although I'm able to be lazy and stay in bed with him, he also sleeps for shorter periods of time with me. When he was born I was proud that he could sleep for 4 to 6 hours, but now, he barely makes it to the 4 hour mark. He's actually sleeping worse than ever, in my opinion, so I'm going to sacrifice my comfort and sleep that I've gotten used to for the next month to get back into a good routine, and cross your fingers, he'll mostly be sleeping through the night by the time he is 5 months old. (Oh yeah, he just turned 4 months this Tuesday!)

This came to my attention yesterday when I went over the papers sent home from his recent check-up. According to them, he ought to be sleeping through the night more now and I need to reduce nighttime feedings, especially if he's just using my breast as comfort and he's not really hungry (which I'm 100% sure he's dong). 

So I'm going to start out with the Johnson's bedtime approach with their Lavender bedtime soap and lotion. I'll come back in a week and update everyone on how that's going, which is hopefully well. 

Haha, ok, he woke up from his nap (that's another thing we need to work on - longer naps)

Bye!!!

1,000 Views! And my First Videos

First of all, thanks everyone who has been reading my blog. Signing in today I discovered that I have over a thousand views now! I've always tried to blog and haven't been great about keeping up with it, but it's much easier when you see that someone is actually interested. So thanks!!!

In addition to my blog, I have made a couple videos with some tips on how to fly with a baby, thanks to what I learned on my recent trip to Austin. I was really nervous but thought it was a good opportunity for a video. I've got part one and two up now for your viewing pleasure!





I hope these can help someone out... there's a lot of other (better) videos about flying with babies but hopefully my quality will only get better with time.

Keep reading and I should have some more videos here soon!

Lily